When an animal companion dies, it is perfectly normal to feel a sense of overwhelming grief and despair. Often, in our confused state, we have difficulty coping with the decision as to what to do with the pet's body. We may feel uncertain as to what is socially acceptable in saying our last goodbyes to our beloved animal friend and, therefore, may not be in a position to make an informed decision.

Saying farewell and closing this chapter in our lives is an important step in the coping process. Just as we have elaborate funerals for human companions, it is just as important to have a final closing ceremony for our pets.

We trust that the information in this book will help you make an informed decision with regard to the final arrangements for your pet's body. To ensure that you will feel at peace with your choice, itšs important that you fullyunderstand all the options available to you, the relative costs, and regulations.

Regardless of your decision, always keep in mind that no two situations are the same. Although your choice may differ from that of another person, if it feels right, then it is the best choice for you.

Funeral Services for your dog

Whether you opt for burial or cremation, you may find it helpful to hold a family funeral service or special memorial ceremony for your beloved pet. Offering a final eulogy at the time of the pet's death often provides closure to the event. Involving children and friends in the final service helps to validate their attachment to the pet and provides an outlet to express feelings.

There are also many ways you can memorialize your pet, such as: planting a tree or flower garden in their memory, writing a story or poem, putting together a special photo album, or making a donation in the animal's
memory to your favorite animal-related charity.

A Final Note

Whatever your final choice may be, please remember, there is no right or wrong way to say good-bye to your pet. This is a difficult time in your life and you have the right to your grief and feelings of sadness. Find solace in knowing that you are not alone, that others feel your pain and understand. Should you need to talk with someone, call your veterinarian or humane society to see if there is a Pet Loss Support Group in your area.

Most Pet Loss Support Groups provide confidential telephone support and hold regular monthly drop-in group support meetings. There is usually no charge to talk to a support giver, and there may or may not be a small charge to attend a meeting.

In Canada:

The Pet Loss Support Group
cAn Alberta Society

Box 335, #440-10816 Macleod Trail South
Calgary, Alberta CANADA T2J 5N8
Phone: 1-403-246-0091

In the United States:

The Delta Society

289 Perimeter Road East
Renton, Washington
U.S.A. 98055-1329
Phone: 1-800-869-6898
Fax: 1-425-235-1076
Email: Info@deltasociety.org

Article submitted by: © Terri Perrin (Biography & Additional Information)

Of all the things that make a house a home, few are as important as the family pet. Whether the pet is a gerbil, a Great Dane, or a little gray tabby, there are no means by which we can measure the significance of the role that animals play in our families.

All too often it is not until the pet becomes lost or passes away that we realize just how much we loved him or her. Until that happens, it is difficult to imagine life without Fido or Felix. When it does happen, it can have varying effects on virtually every member of the family.

Emotions can range from complete devastation and depression to total lack of concern. Just as some people are more devastated by the break up of a marriage, a job loss, or other personal life crisis, some people take the death of a companion animal much more seriously than others.

For children, the trauma of the event can be compounded because its often their first real encounter with the reality and finality of death. It can be a terrifying and heart breaking experience for them.

Be Honest About the Loss

The biggest mistake adults can make in discussing the passing of a pet is to say the animal was "put to sleep". You think that the child will envision the deceased pet curled up on a fluffy pillow in heaven. In reality, what they imagine is that they themselves may go to sleep at night and never wake up again. Or they may confuse the term with a general anesthetic at the hospital where you ego to sleepe for an operation.

As difficult as it may be for you, tell your child simply that their pet has died. It is not necessary to give complete details or to point fingers and place the blame on anyone or anything else. Just be straightforward and honest. Avoid using any misleading and confusing euphemisms.

How “Old” is Too Old?

Another mistake we often make in discussing companion animal death with children is to dwell on the concept that the pet was old. Think of how it must sound to a 12-year-old boy when you tell him that 13-year-old Brandy died of "old age". If you fail to stress the vast difference in the life spans of animals and humans you could be putting your child through a great deal of unnecessary psychological trauma.

Never Underestimate The Power of a Hug

When you are consoling a bereaved child, the first thing you must communicate to the child is that he/she is not alone. One of the best ways to do this is through touch.

If your quiet time and discussions turn out to be nothing more than a time to hold each other and weep, that's okay. This is the correct time to express your deep-felt loss, and crying is an integral part of the grief process. The ability to talk about the things you loved about the pet, without breaking into tears, will come with time.

It is also important for children to hear the news about this sad loss from a parent or person they love and respect. Although we may be overcome with grief ourselves, we must take the time to express the positive feelings about the deceased pet with our children. Most importantly, allow the children time to talk about how they feel about the death.

Look In A Book

There are several excellent picture books that can be used as tools to help young children cope with pet loss. These books are most useful in a case where the pet is terminally ill or very old.

For parents (and teachers) who have spent years nurturing children to love and respect other living creatures, the death of a pet can be exceptionally difficult to explain or comprehend. However, as sad as it may be, it is a natural part of life-one that we should handle as gently and tenderly as we would a newborn kitten.

Recommended Reading

Helping Children Cope With Separation and Loss - by Claudia L. Jewett

I'll Always Love You - by Hans Wilhelm

The Tenth Good Thing About Barney - by Judith Viorst

Jim's Dog Muffins - by Miriam Cohen

Good-bye Max by Holly Keller

Article submitted by: © Terri Perrin (Biography & Additional Information)